Jeff and I have been debating on getting a puppy for a while now. But I wasn’t sure because Tex is such a good dog. We remember that Tex did love Scotty. So we thought he would like to have another dog around. We thought a female dog this time.

Jeff found this 5-month-old puppy named Marley that was 2 hours away from us. We put in our application and was approved very fast. On Wednesday we schedule a meet-up and possibly take her home. We had to bring Tex with us. He did really good in the car this time. He doesn’t like car rides.

We met her at her Foster’s mom house. Nice lady and huge fenced-in backyard. We liked Marley but I wasn’t too sure. Jeff really liked her so we decided to take her. When we got home it was NOT good. Tex was having a huge panic attack like we have never seen before. Marley was not nice to him and even tried to bite him. Also, she didn’t like me. She would never look at me or give me kisses. When Jeff held her, she would give him kisses and look at him. I could tell she didn’t care for me. Plus Tex having this huge panic attack.

Tex has never ever been aggressive toward other people or other dogs ever. He was cool with my sister’s dogs and my Aunt’s dogs. He has seen and been around other dogs. But Marley was being aggressive towards Tex. It was not a good situation.

Jeff talked to the Foster mom and asked if we could bring her back and she was totally cool with that. She thanked us for being really honest about it. Why lie about that.

When we got back again really late at night. Tex was like we have never seen him before. He started talking and being super affectionate! He was super happy for us to be back and with no other dog with us.

We have learned a lesson. Tex has to be the only one. We are cool with that. At least now we know. As I said Tex is such a great dog! He doesn’t chew on anything, never has an accident, he is fun-loving and overall a great dog.

Goodbye 2021

This is going to be a long one. I will start with the now and then head backward. Then go back to what I wasn’t ready to share but now ready to share. I feel good about our decision. But let’s go back to last week. On Monday 12-20-2021. We took the parents to see the Santa Rockin’ Lights. I was disappointed. It was shorter than the other years. We took a video in 2019 and confirmed that this year was fewer lights. Sad! However, it isn’t just about the lights. It’s the time I get to spend with my parents just us. We like that.

Then on Wednesday I was trying to move this heavy box and did something really stupid. I didn’t lift with my knees and hurt my back really badly. To the point, I couldn’t hardly move. I have hurt my back in the past but this was the worst I have ever done. So that meant I had to skip Christmas. Which really sucked. My parents came by the day before and celebrated a little with us and brought some presents. They brought our presents to give to everyone else. I was sad because I do like Christmas and giving presents. What made me sad was that no one called me. The only person to say thank you was Corey. Positive it was nice to not go to Christmas as well. It was bad outside and to drive an hour away would have been a pain. Plus I got to chill with Jeff. That is always the best.

This year went pretty fast, I have to say. I made a lot of things this year. That’s always fun. Let’s see I made a bunch of diamond paintings, made some Yodas with my looms, and did some cross-stitching. That’s a lot.

I fell off my diet and gained all my weight back and then some. Yes, I did. I ate whatever I wanted and only exercised sometimes. Jan 1st is Keto all the way. I never ever want to be this fat again. Even though it will be really tough it will be worth it.

Jeff and I are saying goodbye to adoption. Oh, I really wanted to have a child or children by the time I turned 40. Life has different plans for different people. As for Jeff and me, we decided to be kidless. We are happy being fur baby parents. It was a long and hard decision to make. We didn’t fully understand what it was like to have strangers poke in our lives and I mean they want to know EVERYTHING. We aren’t like that. We like to be private people not like we don’t have social media but not like that. That was CRAZY!

On top of that, they say that you are not buying a baby when you really are. They sell you on that. In total, we probably spent 3 thousand however if we were to get a baby and the legal fees all of that would have been around 20 grand. Who has that just around? Yes, you get some of that back from the government but that’s only if the child has been with you for some months. It’s so crazy to have that kind of cash on hand to adopt a child. We picked one of the lessor adoption agencies because cash was a real factor in what we could afford. Also felt like they weren’t in it for the money. However, if you got loads of money you can have a child in a year or two. That is how it goes. But of course, you are NOT buying a baby. Sure……

After coming to the conclusion that I don’t want or need to have kids to be happy. WOW, my whole mental health changed to be more positive. I was always a bit sad around Christmas because I thought of what it would be like when we would have a kid. But now I don’t feel that way. I don’t hate kids or anything like that. I see Jeff and me how we are now and it’s great. We have free time. I sleep in on Sundays. I don’t know if we save money. lol! But it’s pretty great plus we have Tex. Maybe another dog in the future not sure. But I see all the positives not of having children.

The hardest part was telling my parents that we are going kidless. We were surprised by their reaction they were cool with it. WHAT!!!??!! That isn’t my mom at all. But yeah she was cool with it. Wow!

This year like any year had ups and downs. I learned a lot this year more about myself. I know I grew more mentally and emotionally. (And physically but the wrong way. LOL!)

I’m looking forward to whatever 2022 will bring.

Goodbye, 2021!

Life

It’s that time of year again to be crapped on. YAY! Yeah I am a bit mad right now. The thing is I shouldn’t be but I am. That’s the hard part. I shouldn’t, I should let it go because it is what it is. But I can’t help it being mad at my siblings once more because tis the season.

Ah yes that time again to talk about Christmas gifts. Everything was going so well too. We all decided to go all in for parents gifts. I like that idea. What I don’t like as now everyone saying don’t buy my kids gifts and us too.

WELL WTF?!

This is what makes me mad because we already got all the kids gifts. Plus I made everyone a cross stitch picture. I am mad because I didn’t have to waste my time on that. And Jeff is making that cool sign for Drew. All that time and money but mostly time. So yeah I am MAD! They could have let us know ahead of time. Well just too DAMN bad they are getting Christmas presents and they shove them where the sun don’t shine for all I care. And I know I shouldn’t be angry but I am.

Seems like every year it’s like this and I should’ve of know by now. But it feels like being punished for having a big heart. Ugh! Damn you feelings.

(Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly)

Last Saturday we went to our last adoption training. YAY!

We had to go to Milwaukee for our last training and sit with two other couples for 8 hours. It was a long day. However every one was nice. We have one more thing to do now. We have to make a scrapbook on ourselves so the birth mom’s can look at it and hopefully choose us.

I am excited we are almost done with the first process of adoption! YAY!

Life

This week is chill week before crazy week!

Next week a lot of things are going on. I finally get my tooth fixed. Been waiting for almost 2 months. Getting a new crown. I am also if the weather is good go see Doctor Sleep. I can’t wait! It snowed and it’s now winter as it doesn’t melt.

Also next weekend we go for our final adoption training. Finally we will be done with all of that training. Then all we have to do is make a adoption scrapbook so birth mom’s can look at and hopefully one will choose us.

Adoption

I am surprised how proactive Jeff is being. We are now on the training part of the process and I thought for sure he would lag on that but he has been more proactive than me!

Surprising!

We learned some good stuff, I suppose and we are almost done with our part. Yay! What we will have left is six hours with our case worker. I hope we can just get that done soon.

That’s it just a lot of training this week to get done.

Adoption

WHOOOOOOO! We are finished with all of our home studies!

Now all we have left is our training then after that we wait to be approved for our Foster Care license. Which Kate said it will take a few weeks. Then we go into the pool of other couples. At that time Kate can show moms our profile.

I was worried that Kate wouldn’t like our house but she really didn’t nit pick on things. Just walked around and said we have to do our check list. But she doesn’t see anything wrong with our house. Whew!

Now on to the training.

Adoption

Yesterday June 10 we had our second home study done. This time Kate our case worker was a different person. We felt more comfortable with her and we got to know her a little better. I think that helped.

Yet again not an house inspection more interview! I was surprised when we had to fill out more questions. They really know all about us and our family history. It’s crazy! Who knew how many questions there could be for two people.

We finally have the classes we need to take. We have to take 19 hours of classes which are online. Then 6 hours at the office which is in Milwaukee. That will be an all day thing.

Tex still hates her. LOL!

Adoption

May 13th we had our first home visit. I was super nervous as I didn’t know how it was going to go. Since we started the home visit we owe our first $2,000 dollars.

Found out didn’t have to clean the house so well. The first visit is an interview. So many questions! Also we both got a strange vibe from her. On the phone she seemed like a warm, caring person but in person total opposite! Not a warm, caring person!

Tex does not like her at all! He barked at her like I have never seen before. He was foaming at the mouth barking at her. We had to put him outside. It was strange yes he barks at people but after awhile he becomes with friends with people. He just didn’t like Kate at all! Never seen him like that before. I guess we all think the same she a strange person.

She also would ask questions in a strange way. Kept saying we are too quiet. Well that is us deal with it. lol! Oh well we will continue to do this since we haven’t changed our minds that we still want to adopt.

We have to do 26 hours of classes. Not sure what they are yet. For sure we have to do 6 hours in person. That means we are going to Milwaukee which is about almost 3 hours away. WORTH IT!

Life

Looks like I didn’t win that writing contest. I really tried though. I am a little sad the money would have gone for adoption. What can I say here but oh well. We’ll figure it out.

Speaking of which the adoption lady finally got back to us. She gave us literally a small book we had to fill out about our childhood. Thinking of my childhood and filling out this questionnaire was okay. Clearly Jeff had an awesome childhood. Which I already know that. I had a pretty good childhood too. His is filled with both parents in his life. While mine is mostly filled with just my mom even though my dad was around. He was such a workaholic though. That means he wasn’t home and away in other states a lot. What I remember the most is he never could remember my birthday. Isn’t that strange?! The one thing that made me remember him not being home is my birthday. I remember him asking mom all the time when it was. My birthday is the easiest March 17th.

What’s sad is one year I got this cool little statue cat with my birth stone in it shaped like a heart. I got it for my birthday and it was from my dad. Later in my life I found out my mom picked it out and all the gifts dad has ‘given’ me. Which really I should have realize that. I feel sorta of dumb that I didn’t figure that out. Only that mom let it slip one year that she picked it out and wrapped it.

Also mine is filled with trying to please my dad like joining a lot of sport teams. This girl isn’t a sports girl. I sucked at every sport I tried to play just so my dad would be happy. Ugh! Looking back I understand the why but he didn’t come to a lot of the games. It was for nothing.

But as an adult now my dad and I have a good relationship. And it seems Jeff is the opposite with his dad. That is sad to think about.

Next on the list of adoption we are going to have our first home visit.

Adoption

You know what is dumb it’s hard to find anyone talking about adoption. I have Googled and looked around to see what it takes to adopt and it’s hard. Even people who adopt don’t even talk about the process. And when I say process like what is all included to adopt? I have no idea why?

Isn’t adoption awesome?! I think so.

So in my journal here I am going to write what it takes. This way if anyone wants to adopt they know.

Alright! We had to get for the application copies of: Birth certificates, SS cards, driver licenses. Then we needed letters from all of our insurances. This one took awhile. We needed any life insurances policies which Jeff and I have both have a couple. Home owner insurance, regular insurance and what it covers for the both of us and car insurance.

Had to go to the bank because the adoption agency gave a us a document that we had to fill out and get notarized so the agency can run background checks on the both of us. We also got a cashier check for $500 that is what it costs just for the application.

Not required but we are sending a check for $500 we are sending it certified mail because that is some money! Better safe than sorry, I say.

Officially this weekend we have started the process!