Went out with the parents last Saturday. It’s always nice seeing them. They wanted to take these chairs we made them so many years ago. When we got them home we realized they need to be thrown away. So, we are making them new chairs as a surprise when they come back from Florida.

We talked about Adam. We discussed that it wasn’t fair what he does to his family. I was surprised my dad even said this. I know my mom gets sad when Adam and I fight or disagree. There just has to be solution this and I found one.

Yesterday, when I called my parents, they told me Adam tried to message me but I had blocked him everywhere even his phone number. They read the message to me, it went something like this: Hey Danielle, I am sorry. Whenever you are ready to have a conversation, reach out to me. You are my sister and I love you.

Yeah okay I was thinking. I just don’t want to disappoint my mom but I have to choose me. I don’t choose me often but for this time I have too. I wrote something that I hesitate to send but Jeff voice of reason was like. “You can’t let him keep treating you this way. He can’t contact you every time he just wants something”. That isn’t right, I agreed and sent it.

I told him, this year I will not be in contact with him. I gave him reason why I won’t because I was very hurt what he said 2 weeks ago and I no longer will be treated that way anymore. To give me space and I will talk to you when I feel ready to do so.

I also want to enforce that he CAN’T treat me like this in the future. Because no contact is terrible for him but that’s what he has been doing to me all this time and it isn’t right. I feel better when I don’t have contact with him. He doesn’t live rent free in my head for long. 2 weeks ago I was hurt but got over it in a few days. It’s nice not to be the one he can ghost and then come back for money usually. He needs to learn a lesson and this is a hard lesson he will have to learn because unlike all those other times, I am not giving in and choosing my mental health then pleasing any family member.